Roz (Roseline) Salazar Joining the Air Force was my childhood dream. I was just 4 years old when I saw my two older brothers in their Army Battle Dress Uniforms (BDU) and instantly knew I would like to be like them when I grew up. Looking through pictures of them inspired me more to where I wanted to grow up fast. High school was approaching and the opportunity for Junior Reserve Officer Training was a program I looked forward to but didn’t happen because my dad opposed to it. I graduated high school in June of 1994, ready to leave but all of a sudden, my father got sick. I ended up not leaving for the military right away since I wanted to spend time with my dad. I started school at a community college with plans to leave should my dad get better. Unfortunately, he passed away in January 1995, my mom got injured in March of 1995, then few months later in July I got into a motorcycle accident. I was crushed, there went my dreams of joining the military. But prayers, love, support and perseverance, I was given a second chance. In October of 1996, I was given a second chance and left for the Air Force Basic Training in San Antonio, Texas.
Basic training was not as hard as I though considering my up bringing was similar… My father yelled at us kids and he taught us to survive. I started working with him at his shop since I was 5 years old, his reasoning for this was we needed to learn the value of earning money… That nothing is for free and has to be earned. This surely helped me during my military years. After basic training, I attend a twelve-week technical school to train me up on my assigned job for the Air Force. After being disciplined for weeks, this was the break to our freedom. Like my father taught me, everything needs to be earned. Like technical training, we had to earn our base liberty, then liberty to leave base and enjoy our freedom of touring the San Antonio are. This was just the start of a very fun yet interesting journey. During our first weeks of technical training we were restricted to hour dormitory area, still had to attend formation, go to chow as a flight (group of school attendees). Two weeks later we earned our liberty to go to the enlisted club on base. This is where my first unfortunate incident happened. On the first night of freedom at the club, I was sitting with a friend whom I will refer to as Tony to protect his privacy. He mentioned about being stationed at my hometown after technical school. We chatted, gave him ideas of places to visit and fun things to do. About an hour later, a male airmen whom we will refer to as Andy (to protect his privacy), came up to me, slapped my face so hard that I fell off my chair. I was shocked, immediately turned him in. He was placed on administration hold and a week later, with a third part from leadership, I was able to ask him why did slap me. He said he wanted me so bad, but I never gave him the time of day. Wow, this was news to me, because I was always nice to everyone and not once did, he say he was interested. But that’s beside the point, he slapped me which would have happened had we started dating. He was eventually discharged from the Air Force. After technical training, I was off to my first base. I met some new friends, we all hung out as a group and although I had lots of trust issues because of my up brining, I really felt like I found my new family away from home. My mistake was, I let my guard down to quick. I mean, I was twenty years old, my childhood was robbed so now I have all the freedom to do what I want. I was really naïve to let my guard down and trusted to quick. Little had I known one of the guys whom I hung out with wanted me so bad and again, I had no interest in him because I wanted to enjoy single life. We will refer to him as Mike, also to protect his privacy. About 6 months into my new duty station, Mike notified me that he was leaving for a deployment and asked me to take care of his belongings while he was gone. He trusted me and gave me a power of attorney. Upon his return, I planned a welcome home party with our friends however, no one showed up but Mike. Apparently, he notified our friends that he was tired and will want to rest. I was left out of that group conversation, but Mike came over to my place, brought dinner for us to thank me for taking care of his car, apartment, and belongings. Dinner was nice, our chat was great. All of a sudden, I started feeling dizzy. I actually fell asleep. I woke up briefly seeing Mike on top of me but couldn’t keep my eyes open. The next morning, I was in my bed, sore and aching. I called him and asked what happened, he told me he’ll take me out to dinner again during the week. We met up and while in his car, he admitted to putting a sleeping pill in my Pepsi and then raping me. I was so angry, felt so betrayed. I asked him why… his response was “I knew you wouldn’t give in, so I had to take matters in my own hands.” He went on to say that during his deployment, all he could think about was me. I felt so disgusted, I reported him as well. I immediately went to get blood tests everywhere until I was told to stop as all had negative results for any type of STDs. I felt horrible and dirty to where I’d sit in my tub and scrub myself till I would bleed. After turning him in, our mutual friends pretty much took his side except for one female who ended up betraying me at the end. After all the investigations, the waiting for the outcome and built up depression, his claim of we having consensual sex was validated. I was so distraught and knew that he had the advantage to convince the investigators and leadership that he was right since I was the new girl on the block. I asked for a permanent change of station because this was such an unfair event and I couldn’t function anymore. I didn’t know who to trust and I didn’t want to trust anyone to include leadership. I was done. I moved on to my new base and told myself I will start fresh and keep my guard up. So why me? I will never get my answer and had to find closure on my own by letting it go and accept that I will never see justice for what had happen. It’s unfortunate for us victims because he does scar us for life. At the same time, I told myself I will be the better person, so I completed my degree and became a commissioned officer. It didn’t erase the past but it did help boost my confidence as this was the next big accomplishment in my life. https://roselinesalazar.com My interview with Roz on StarzPsychicsNetwork: https://www.blogtalkradio.com/starzcast/2020/09/17/natalie-talks-live-with-veteran-author-roseline-f-pagala-salazar |
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