![]() David Essel, M.S, O.M This is a great question!
If you’re an entrepreneur, executive, small business owner, you probably have fallen into one of two categories: Number one. In the beginning of your career, you had to grind on a daily and weekly basis maybe missing vacations maybe missing weekends maybe missing events you’d love to go to , but you know as an executive or entrepreneur or small business owner that especially in the beginning of the business we have to grind, in order to be successful. Number two. You know that when you’re in that mode of grinding , That it can’t last forever. You feel irritability coming on, you feel impatients coming on, maybe even anger… And even though you’ve been doing this work for 10 or 20 or 30 years you still believe that you have to grind to be successful! Any type of work life balance? Out of the question! Anyway to get around the grinding, and still be successful? Yes! As a matter fact the answer is yes! I’m super excited to write this article because as an entrepreneur for 43 years I have to admit that I spent so much time grinding, which led to A greater dependency on alcohol, eventually depression, eventually burn out, and then I would get it together and take some downtime for a few days only to repeat the cycle! Now why is it so hard to stop grinding, when we know it’s taking a massive toll on our mind our health our relationships and more? Number one. We see our peers doing it. When we look around and we hear our friends talking about working 50 hours or 60 hours or 70 hours a week the peer pressure can get to us and we can feel that we’re missing out and we need to get back into the grind. Number two. Mass consciousness. If you read enough articles on successful people, at some point in their career, they realized the damage that was being done as they continued to grind in their work, but they want to keep up with the all stars, they want to keep up with the people who are in the news who constantly talk about how many hours they put in on a weekly basis. It takes an extremely independent, let me repeat this, it takes an extremely independent entrepreneur or executive or small business owner to break out of the mindset that “grinding is what you do for the rest of your life !“ Number three. It feels good! To be able to brag about how many hours we put in on a weekly basis which made us miss our favorite movie… Can make us feel like we are on top of the world! We can start to brag about how many hours we put in… “Sweat equity“… It’s hard to let this go. We have set a pattern in the subconscious mind that “workaholism or grinding“, is necessary to be successful for life! Now let’s look at the other side of the equation, because I struggled for so many years as a workaholic, very minimal social life, everything to do with work, work and more work. How do we get out of this routine? Number one. First, see that you’re in this routine! We have to be aware that we are grinding, that we are burning out, we’ve got to look at the signs of irritability or an increase in food intake or an increase in alcohol as signs that we’re going down the wrong road way. So awareness is the first step. Number two. Hire an accountability partner! I had to do the same thing, our subconscious mind is so powerful that we can set the intention that we will cut back to 50 hours a week or 40 hours a week or 30 hours a week… But how many of us actually do it? When you hire an accountability partner, they can hold your feet to the fire and when you check in with them every week they can help you make decisions to get back on the “less grinding schedule.“ Number three. Do the work. No excuses. Yes there’s gonna be withdrawal. Yes you’re going to feel uncomfortable. I still have to be very aware on a daily basis of when I start to go into my grinding and workaholic mindset. It still pops up I haven’t completely mastered it but it’s gotten so much better! i’ve made some changes in how late I work at night, I made some changes in how early I start in the morning, I made some changes by rarely doing any of my counseling and coaching work on the weekends, and that was not easy. My weekends used to be packed with clients! And of course that brought in extra income which brought in some sort of peace of mind, but it took away really living at my highest level. As I continue to institute little rules and boundaries here and there I’m starting to feel less stress, less guilt and shame. Believe it or not , those two emotions follow the workaholics routine their whole life. I’ve actually had to stop doing some of my professional networking work, because that was turning into so many hours every week that I needed to use for my own self-care. More tennis. More gym time. More nature walks. More alone time. And it works! And I know it will work for you as well. If you need help, the information to reach out to me is below. Anyone can change, but you’ll probably need someone to help you move through something this big, something this massive, and something this important for your existence.“ David Essel‘s work is highly endorsed by individuals like the late Wayne Dyer, and celebrity Jenny McCarthy says, “David Essel is the new leader of the positive thinking movement.“ His work as a counselor, minister and executive coach has been verified by many organizations such as, Psychology Today, Theravive and Therapy Tribe. To reach out to David for help with your work/life balance, or any other goal you might have simply visit https://www.davidessel.com M.S., O.M., Executive Coach, Counselor |
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