May Poems (for Allen Yuan)

      

By Changming Yuan

Allenian Dragonmania my younger son is the greatest fun of dragons i’ve ever known as a chinaman he could lecture hours nonstop on their various magic talents not knowing they are devilish beyond the touch of his mother tongue he often insists in his own room everything is transformed from a dragon once he asked me in loud indignation why he was not born in the year of dragon on a white night with a black fright allen shrieked all his way to my dream confused, confounded and horrified till he told me a fantastic tale: a real living dragon in its proto form had thrown a visit through his window confessing behind his mind’s curtain it had been deeply touched by the tremendous tenders of affection my son had made to him in private At the Kitslano Beach i spot and pick up a curious clam whose flimsy lips fairly open and her tongue keeps reaching out as if to reveal the saltiness of seawater the sad face of sand and anecdotes about certain fishes whose narration i really do not understand although my younger son assures me he can Big Al in Wonderland Qucheng Homerburgh Dantefield Shakespeareston Goethestadt Pushkingrad Baudelaireville Nerudastad Frostdale Tagorerboro Fatherly Fear how much just how much love should I show you, Son I do not know, I only know how I had tried how I’d persisted in having you as my second child, a lifelong companion to your bro how I had found the greatest joy in merely seeing you after each long and hard day but I never meant for you to have been 36 days prematurely born, and to have begun Suffering so much when you were only 12 years old, suffering from a terrible drought within your Chinese skin, suffering from bulged disks that cause you to walk like a cripple, suffering from sciatic pain when you move around, suffering from having to withdraw from your school's volleyball team, suffering from lacking the confidence to emulate your elder brother, suffering from your limitations to kick, jump, run, bend like your friends, suffering from your inability to work outside home to earn your own money, oh Son I do not know, I do not know how much love I should show to you: if a bit too little, you would feel disappointed of my fatherly love if a bit too much, I fear heavens would be so jealous as to take you away from me indeed, how much just how much love should I show you, Son I do not know, I only know after I die, my other self will stand right behind your back wherever you are, whenever there is or there is no sunshine ready to protect you against all evil gods and ghosts but while still alive, I do not know, Son how much love I should show you: if a bit too little, you might feel disappointed of my fatherly love if a bit too much, I fear heavens might be so jealous as to take you away from me The Fashion above the Movement Used to sell T-shirts both on and Off line while in high school Each with his own brand name Above the Moment printed somewhere Somehow. During the summer holidays I saw few strangers wearing his garments (Except a few of his friends and classmates) and Fewer dollars kept close to his id He did have a few followers, even fans, one Of whom admitted admiring Allen’s entrepreurship In the fashion industry; that is all the dynamics Of his movement below adulthood, or The adult world, where people care more About money or masking than about T-shirts Codicil: To Qing Qing After I die, Son Wrap my body with my poems Put all my remains In an e.cask, and send it To a site that will Never be on hiatus By burying me online You can readily Trace my soul traveling From one living screen To another As long as you have access To the virtual space Yuan Changming started to learn English at age 19 and published monographs on translation before leaving China. With a Canadian PhD in English, Yuan currently edits Poetry Pacific with Allen Qing Yuan and hosts Happy Yangsheng in Vancouver; credits include ten Pushcart & three Best of the Net nominations, Best of the Best Canadian Poetry, BestNewPoemsOnline, Threepenny Review and 1,409 others across 41 countries. poetrypacific.blogspot.ca happyyangsheng.blogspot.ca Image & License: Depositphotos_32738103_s-2015