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Barbara Berger
Reality is what it is. Life is what it is. But our experience of this thing called life is determined by our thoughts and underlying beliefs about life—whether we are conscious of these thoughts and beliefs or not. And whether we are conscious of this mechanism or not.
Or as I like to say:
“The only meaning anything has is the meaning you give it.”
Which is something
we can meditate on for the rest of our lives.
“The only meaning anything has is the meaning you give it.”
Which is something
we can meditate on for the rest of our lives.
And because our basic beliefs about life determine our experience of reality to a far greater degree than most of us realize, it serves us well to investigate this phenomenon. So what am I talking about? I’m talking about taking a look at our basic underlying beliefs about this thing called “life” (which most people are unaware of).
So first of all, where do these basic beliefs come from? Well, these basic beliefs are something we learned in early childhood. Which happens to everyone. Everyone learns their basic beliefs from their parents and immediate family when they are tiny. Then we learn from friends, teachers and the society we grow up in, and also of course from the media, our religion and culture. You can say that from the moment we are born, we are all being programmed with beliefs about what is good or bad, desirable or undesirable. In other words, we learn the belief systems of our family and culture. And most of us are quite unaware or unconscious of the fact that we are being programmed. But we are. Everyone is. This programming just happens. You could say that we are all innocent children who simply believe what our parents and family and friends and teachers tell us and teach us.
This is just the way things are. And we don’t get a say about the way we are being programmed. It just happens automatically.
No independent individual views
Oh but you say, I’m an intelligent, independent individual with my own independent views on life and reality. And yes, you can say this is true to a certain extent. To a certain extent, each person has his or her own unique spin or version of the Nature of Reality, depending on his or her personal background, family, education, etc. which does result in different reactions to the same events and different life experiences, but this is not the whole story. Every individual is also to a greater or lesser degree influenced by their earliest programming which we usually call our cultural background or heritage.
Here’s an example of what I mean. I was born and raised in the US and lived there until I was 20. After traveling the world for some years, I ended up in Denmark where I have been living ever since. Once I settled here in Denmark, I discovered that the Danes (and the people of the other Scandinavian countries) have a unique, underlying belief they call the “Jante Law” and this “Jante Law” says “Don't think you're anyone special or that you're better than us.” By this, the Danes mean that you shouldn’t put yourself forward, be pushy—and worse yet—be boastful about your achievements.
I remember when I first heard this, I thought it was a pretty strange belief – and it didn’t sound very serious or important to me. But slowly over the years, I began to see how this “Jante Law” influenced almost everything and everyone who lives here in Denmark and in the other Nordic countries (Sweden and Norway). As a result of this cultural code, I started to realize how much it is frowned upon here in Scandinavia to appear to elevate oneself above one’s peers or to claim to be better or smarter than others. This was of course very surprising to me because I grew up in America where we were taught that we should be proud of showing off our achievements.
Universal beliefs
There are also some beliefs that are universal and shared by almost everyone. Beliefs about life and death and aging, for example. Beliefs which seem to be common to the human condition because almost everyone has these basic beliefs, regardless of their background, culture, religion, age, sex and status.
Again, these are underlying beliefs which we are often unaware of and which have a much greater influence on our choices, actions and experience of life than most of us realize. And unfortunately, these beliefs can also wreak havoc on our lives—until we begin to be aware of them and learn to question their validity.
Slowing down the wheels of mind
All of the things I’ve mentioned above are also why learning to slow down the wheels of mind and notice what we are thinking and believing can be so enlightening. When we do this, we get a chance to see what our beliefs are and how these beliefs may be affecting our lives. Which can be very liberating because this insight allows us to take our power back as the choice-makers in our lives and to question our thinking and our beliefs. A good technique to question your thinking and your beliefs is the 4 Questions of the Work of Byron Katie. When we learn to question our beliefs, it usually helps us learn to make better choices for ourselves instead of being slaves to beliefs that we were unaware of and therefore never questioned.
As you probably know, I work every day with people as a coach and therapist and help people understand the power of their minds and their beliefs. You are most welcome to contact me if you would like to have a session with me. For more see: https://www.barbarabergercoaching.com
Blessings to you!
_____
To see all my many articles on MysticLivingToday, click here:
http://beamteam.com/en/barbara/barbara_berger_articles_mystic_living_today.html
About Barbara Berger
American-born Barbara Berger is the best-selling author of “The Road to Power – Fast Food for the Soul” (published in 30 languages), “Are You Happy Now? 10 Ways to Live a Happy Life” (published in 21 languages), “The Awakening Human Being – A Guide to the Power of Mind”, and "Find and Follow Your Inner Compass". Barbara’s latest books include “Healthy Models for Relationships – the Basic Principles Behind Good Relationships” and her autobiography entitled “My Road to Power – Sex, Trauma & Higher Consciousness”. Barbara lives in Copenhagen, Denmark and works as coach and therapist, helping people around the globe come into alignment with their own true power. For more about Barbara see her
Web site: http://www.beamteam.com
